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Question Time

By Mark Mason
Authors:
Mark Mason
Which major UK retailer has the same name as Odysseus's dog in Greek mythology?In the original version of the Band Aid hit 'Do They Know It's Christmas?', who sang the opening line?Which is the only US state whose name can be typed on a single row of a QWERTY keyboard?Travel writer and quiz fan Mark Mason decided to combine two of his greatest loves by setting off on a tour of Britain's quizzes. From a pub quiz in Edinburgh to a charity quiz in Hampshire, from a corporate quiz in Birmingham to a journalists' quiz in Parliament, he finds answers aplenty while asking some questions of his own. Just what is it that attracts us to these tests of our knowledge? What are the ingredients of the perfect quiz question? And which is the only English city whose official name begins with H?The only travel book ever to discuss Winston Churchill's use of language and reveal Donald Duck's middle name, QUESTION TIME is an affectionate tribute to Britain and one of its most cherished institutions - the quiz.'A must-have book for any quiz lover' THE TIMES
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Elis and John Present the Holy Vible

By Elis James, John Robins
Authors:
Elis James, John Robins
'Elis and John are my go-to place when I need a bloody good laugh. Properly funny!' Sarah MillicanComedians Elis James and John Robins have captured the hearts and minds of a generation, and it's time those hearts and minds had a book.Elis and John met in 2005 performing stand-up comedy in a pub called The Yellow Kangaroo in Cardiff. They eyed each other suspiciously before Robins offered the limpest handshake in the history of the world.'It was a power play,' says Robins. 'I may even have raised it for him to kiss.' James expands: 'It was one of the weirdest things I'd ever experienced, but having known John now for over a decade, it was the tip of the iceberg. I can honestly say he's the oddest man I've ever met.'Little did they know that ten years later they would be presenting a radio show together that would make them comedy royalty...Ok, radio comedy royalty...Ok, commercial digital indie radio royalty...But with a podcast! Now, The Elis James and John Robins' Show has become cult listening, and that cult has registered for charitable status, published quarterly accounts and been given a full blessing by the Archbishop of Broadcasting. It's official: Elis and John are a religion, and this book is their Holy Vible.Have you ever failed to Keep It Session? Is your new flatmate a complete coin? Have you ever eaten Space Raiders on the toilet and written 'Grief Is Living' in your journal? Then this book is for you. If not, don't worry, it won't be long before you're making up games, looking at Freddie, or facing your own personal farthing-gate.Our obsessions make us what we are, and though you may never have addressed a will to Brian May or cried watching Ronnie O' Sullivan make a 147, you'll have done something similar, and Elis and John are here to tell you that you're not weird, so come on in, and taste the vibe! Or should I say, READ the vibe!
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The Best of Matt 2018

By Matt Pritchett
Authors:
Matt Pritchett
Nobody does it better - award-winning cartoonist Matt gives a brilliantly funny take on the last 12 months.From politics to paparazzi, weather to the woeful rail services, health service to health scares, only Matt nails it every single time. He makes the world a far brighter place!'Captures the absurdities of a situation better than any article' Observer'Matt is a humorist who goes straight for the jocular vein ... brilliant' Kathy Lette
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Your Call

By Jeremy Vine
Authors:
Jeremy Vine
'Full of glorious examples of caller wisdom [with] laugh-out-loud anecdotes' Allison Pearson, Sunday TelegraphJeremy Vine has been presenting his BBC Radio 2 show since 2003 - it now attracts more than seven million listeners. He calculates he has taken more than 25,000 calls from his listeners on issues big and small: life, love, lollipop ladies and poisonous plants.But what have the callers told him? If you listen to Radio 4, Brexit was a shock. If you are on Radio 2 it would not have surprised you at all. Where Jeremy's callers once expressed a kind of resignation ('But what can you do?') or a gloomy rejoinder ('You have to laugh'), now they give him their views expecting to be heeded.Listener wisdom is far more valuable than most of what we hear from appointed spokespeople. What was the response when Jeremy asked: 'Have you ever been pecked in the eye by a gannet?' Which subjects are most likely to start pitched warfare between different sections of the audience? (Answer: old people using buses, old people NOT using buses, cellophane, or Tony Blair saying anything.)In a book punctuated by his own vivid stories and laugh-out-loud moments, Jeremy Vine explains what it's like to hit a button and hear - totally unvarnished and unspun - the voice of the so-called 'ordinary' person. And why we should take notice.
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Always Look on the Bright Side of Life

By Eric Idle
Authors:
Eric Idle
'As funny, wicked, naughty, eye-popping and compulsively, joyously brilliant as the genius who wrote it' Stephen FryWe know him best for his unforgettable roles on Monty Python - from the Flying Circus to The Meaning of Life. Now, Eric Idle reflects on the meaning of his own life in this entertaining memoir that takes us on a remarkable journey from his childhood in an austere boarding school through his successful career in comedy, television, theatre and film. Coming of age as a writer and comedian during the Sixties and Seventies, Eric stumbled into the crossroads of the cultural revolution and found himself rubbing shoulders with the likes of George Harrison, David Bowie and Robin Williams, all of whom became lifelong friends. With anecdotes sprinkled throughout involving Mike Nichols, Mick Jagger, Steve Martin, Paul Simon and many more, as well as the Pythons themselves, Eric captures a time of tremendous creative output with equal parts hilarity and heart.In Always Look on the Bright Side of Life, named after the song he wrote for Life of Brian which has since become the number-one song played at funerals in the UK, he shares the highlights of his life and career with the kind of offbeat humour that has delighted his audiences for five decades. This is a memoir chock-full of behind-the-scenes stories from a high-flying life featuring everyone from Princess Leia to Queen Elizabeth.
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Dragula

By Ma'am Stoker
Authors:
Ma'am Stoker
When Jonathan Harker visits Trans-ylvania to help Count Dragula purchase a London house, he makes some horrifying discoveries in his client's castle (including the wearing of espadrilles without irony) and the local area, where people insist on behaving bizarrely, festooning him with garlic and blethering on about a 'fierce queen', although perhaps something is getting lost in translation. They shout out to him: 'good luck, and don't get slurped up!'. It's about to get even weirder at the castle where there is a battle of wills going on between the mysterious Count and what he terms, the 'blood-sucking b*tches!' in the village, led by the infamous van High-Heelsing. But who will prevail on the runway? As each kween sashays towards the jugular, the reader is taken on a journey to the ultimate lip sync for your life finale.
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Friendship Never Ends

By Ella Dyson
Authors:
Ella Dyson
A big-hearted comedy about friendship, the 90s and the greatest girl band in the world Three independent women - and one man who lives for drama - haven't spoken to their best friend in 20 years, after an epic talent show disaster tore them apart during the height of Spice-mania.Self-appointed gang leader Carmen then decided to go it alone - Geri style. But now, in 2018, the school reunion is fast approaching. Friendship Never Ends tells the story of Carmen's plan to win back her former besties - Jemma, Ellie, Laura and Benny - ahead of the big night. But has Carmen really changed? And can their friendship ever really go back to how it was?

The Adults

By Caroline Hulse
Authors:
Caroline Hulse
'Genuinely unputdownable books are rare in my experience. This is one. A brilliant, original comedy' Daily Mail* * * * *MEET THE ADULTS...Claire and Matt are divorced but decide what's best for their daughter Scarlett is to have a 'normal' family Christmas with them all together.Claire brings her new boyfriend Patrick, a seemingly eligible Iron-Man-in-Waiting. Matt brings the new love of his life Alex, funny, smart, and extremely patient. Scarlett, their daughter, brings her imaginary friend Posey. He's a rabbit.Together the five (or six?) of them grit their teeth over Organized Fun activities, drinking a little too much after bed-time, oversharing classified secrets about their pasts and, before they know it, their holiday is a powder keg that ends - where this story starts - with a tearful, frightened, call to the police...But what happened? They said they'd all be adults about this...* * * * *'I loved The Adults! Funny, dry and beautifully observed. Highly recommended' Gill Sims, #1 bestselling author of Why Mummy Drinks and Why Mummy Swears'Such a breath of fresh air! Witty, intensely human and (dare I say it) relatable ... The perfect comedy of errors' Katie Khan'The Adults is my top read of 2018 so far. Absolutely hilarious ... This one will stay with me for a long time' Cathy Bramley 'Packed with sharp wit, engaging characters and off-beat humour, this is a fresh and feisty thrill-ride of a novel' Heat'I took this book on holiday and couldn't put it down! I've never read anything quite like it' The Unmumsy Mum'Gripped me from the start. Reminiscent of Liane Moriarty's Big Little Lies - a sure-fire winner' Cass Hunter, author of The After Wife'Brilliantly funny - will have you wincing in recognition' Good Housekeeping'I have a feeling Caroline Hulse might be a genius, this book is so brilliant. t's funny, clever and original - I loved every minute of reading it. Also, Posey should get a spin-off TV show' Lucy Vine, author of Hot Mess 'Funny, poignant, real - a truly original book that made me laugh, cry and cringe in equal measure. I loved it' Charlotte Duckworth'Razor-sharp comedy - barbed and brilliant. The characters are totally convincing ... Sparky, heart-felt and fantastically fun, this is a fabulous debut' Sunday Mirror
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Motivational Quotes to Help You Be More Positive

By Chris (Simpsons Artist)
Authors:
Chris (Simpsons Artist)
are you the type of person who:- thinks books are quite good- has never held a book before and would like to try holding one for a day- is completely normal and just wants to look at something- is fed up- would rather be dead- is frightened of what tomorrow may bring- is curious- needs a bit of motivation- wants to feel more positive about your lifethen this is the book for youbecause the words and pictures inside of this book will instantly make you feel more positive about yourself even after just having a look at them for about a second or 3 secondswhat happens to your body when you have no motivation:when you have no motivation it is like a wall of sadness has been built up inside of yourself and it is this wall that stops all of the happy things in the world from getting inside of your body so take my book and use it to break down the wall of sadness brick by brick so that happiness can climb back inside of your body and live there for the rest of your dayslove from your friend Chris (Simpsons artist) xox
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The Quanderhorn Xperimentations

By Rob Grant, Andrew Marshall
Authors:
Rob Grant, Andrew Marshall
ADAPTED BACKWARDS VIA THE FUTURE FROM THE RADIO 4 SERIES BEFORE IT WAS MADE A richer, deeper, more comprehensive exploration of the Quanderhorn phenomenon. With added secrets.England, 1952.A time of peace, regeneration and hope. A Golden Age.Unfortunately, it's been 1952 for the past 65 years.Meet Professor Quanderhorn: a brilliant, maverick scientific genius with absolutely no moral compass. Assisted by a rag-tag crew - his part-insect "son" (reputedly 'a major breakthrough in Artificial Stupidity'), a recovering amnesiac, a brilliant scientist with a half-clockwork brain, and a captured Martian hostage - he'll save the world.Even if he has to destroy it in the process.With his Dangerous Giant Space Laser, Utterly Untested Matter Transfuser Booth and Fleets of Monkey-driven Lorries, he's not afraid to push the boundaries of science to their very limit.And far, far beyond ...
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See Ya Later

By Arron Crascall
Authors:
Arron Crascall
Alright guys? It's me, Arron. Or as some people call me, 'that guy with the phone, the skinny jeans and the really fat head on Facebook'.In a world that seems to be freefalling without a parachute towards utter chaos, I'm here to remind you that when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. No, in fact, when life gives you lemons, make a fool out of yourself in the lemonade aisle.*Because there's more to life than Brexit, Bake Off and banging on about being vegan. Yes, with this book - which is my take on the world - you will learn how to survive a proper lads' holiday, become a master in the art of takeaway ordering and find out about the pitfalls of seriously inappropriate tattoos.So do yourself a favour: turn off the news, cancel that juice cleanse, open your eyes to the brilliant, hilarious world we live in and most importantly . . . buy this book.SEE YA LATER! Arron x*Actually, don't do exactly that, that's my thing.
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How to be Champion

By Sarah Millican
Authors:
Sarah Millican
Hilarious, heartwarming and inspirational, this is the number 1 Sunday Times bestselling autobiography by comedian Sarah Millican. The funniest book of the year! *****'The naughtiest, helpiest, laughieoutloudiest and goodest book I've ever done reading on. Give that girl a banana!' DAWN FRENCH SARAH MILLICAN'S AUTOBIOGRAPHY WILL MAKE YOU LAUGH, FEEL NORMAL AND PROBABLY SNIFF YOUR LEGGINGS. Part autobiography, part self help, part confession, part celebration of being a common-or-garden woman, part collection of synonyms for nunny, Sarah Millican's debut book delves into her super normal life with daft stories, funny tales and proper advice on how to get past life's blips - like being good at school but not good at friends, the excitement of IBS and how to blossom post divorce. If you've ever worn glasses at the age of six, worn an off-the-shoulder gown with no confidence, been contacted by an old school bully, lived in your childhood bedroom in your thirties, been gloriously dumped in a Frankie and Benny's, cried so much you felt great, been for a romantic walk with a dog, worn leggings two days in a row even though they smelt of wee from a distance, then this is YOUR BOOK. If you haven't done those things but wish you had, THIS IS YOUR BOOK. If you just want to laugh on a train/sofa/toilet or under your desk at work, THIS IS YOUR BOOK. 'Of course Sarah Millican's book will make you laugh out loud, but there are moments where she will touch you deeply. The dirty bitch.' KATHY BURKE
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The Royal Wedding Colouring Book

By Adam Rushton
Authors:
Adam Rushton
We all dreamed that we'd one day marry Prince Harry, but now Hollywood royalty Meghan Markle has claimed the throne in a love story fit for the golden age of cinema.But dry your tears because this Royal Wedding Colouring Book is here to celebrate their impending nuptials! You can follow Meghan Markle's journey from legal to regal in this royal romp of a colouring book that features the happy couple in some of the most iconic film scenes in Hollywood history. Bring Prince Harry and his sweetheart Meghan Markle to life in classic scenes from Titanic ('I'm sixth in line to be king of the world!'), Jaws ('You're going to need a bigger moat'), THAT scene from When Harry Met Sally, The Shining ('Heeeere's Harry!') and A Streetcar Named Desire ('I've always depended on the kindness of gingers'), among many others. Packed full of beautiful illustrations fit for a princess, you can also colour in the most famous royal wedding dresses in history, and the bride and groom's happy family as they make their way to Windsor Castle. So what are you waiting for? Put on your hat, grab your confetti and your pencils and start colouring in!